1 Cor 10:23
Everything is permissible, but not everything is beneficial (paraphrase)
This week I started a bible study through proverbs31 ministries (p31.org). We are studying the book "Made to Crave" by Lysa TerKeurst. In all honesty, this is perfect timing.
You all know this blog is about my weight loss journey. As much as I want to lose the weight to feel good about myself, to be healthy, the glory of fitting into my skinny jeans (and posting it on Instagram)... I'm realizing that this journey has to be so much more than that to continue to be successful.
So in the 4 chapters I've devoured of this book (pun totally intended), I have just been blown away by how much The Lord has shown me about ME this week.
Let's cast some light into the dark corners for a second. I hope this is as healing as they say it is.
I dislike the conflict and disorder In my life so much that I try to avoid it at all costs. Sometimes this is subconscious for me and sometimes I'm clapping my hands over my ears and screaming "LA LA LA" to ignore the blindingly obvious problem in front of me. This isn't just a one-facet-of-my-life kind of disease... It has worked it's way through *almost* everything I'm facing.
When I avoid, I eat. Like shameful, hiding in the corner, throw away the fast food bag so my husband doesn't see it, pretend-that-didn't-happen kind of eating. It's obvious from the last 8 years that this isn't working for me. I don't even know how much weight I've actually gained since then- because I was avoiding the scale.
Reading this book, all 4 chapters I've read so far, have just completely ripped off my blinders. I've realized that this isn't just a control over food kinda issue... This is a hiding from God, perfectionistic, walls up, stinking thinking kinda problem.
So there's the problem. It's funny to me how simple simple simple the solution is: ask for help. My job is to ask the Helper, the Healer, my Hope, my Father to replace my fearshamedoubt cravings with cravings of Him.
Cravings have become a prayer trigger for me... A trigger that I need to ask for guidance. In "Made to Crave", Lysa shares on page 29 "God never intended for us to want anything more than we want Him." I mean, wow. How simple and profound is that?
I've been repeating 1 Cor 10:23 to myself. Of course it's permissible to eat whatever I want. When I'm in the kitchen making myself a meal, I'm asking myself: is this beneficial? Is this food going to fuel me to complete my purpose- my God given assignments here on earth? Chances are when I frame my decisions with fueling the Father's will and my work for the Kingdom... I'm going to eat something green instead of something white and refined. Because when I'm really honest with myself, that's what He created for me to eat. God didn't send down Doritos from heaven. He didn't plant Oreo trees either.
I need lots of prayer in this journey. I'd love to pray for some of my brothers and sisters going through this journey too... Share in the comments how I can pray for you and know that you'll have me warring for you as much as I'm warring for myself.
Blessings.
Jaci
