Dreams realized. New focus.

This [weight loss] blog got dropped like a hot potato last spring. Our life as planned got interrupted.

It was the end of April. I had been running a couple miles a week, and in the middle of the month "ran" a 5k with my husband's office. Not only was my time more terrible than my typical terrible time, but I couldn't run longer than 5 minutes, which was shocking because just the week before I had run straight for nearly 30 minutes! I was just exhausted, and winded. Maybe I was getting sick or something.

Then we traveled to my sister in law's wedding in dusty West Texas. I fell asleep on the way there and woke up with the sorest throat ever and feeling super run down. I figured ew, dust. and maybe its a cold coming on.

At the wedding reception, I had a beer. It tasted weird and metallic. Like I picked up a stray house key off the floor and licked it. Hmmmmmm.

On the way home I started to wonder. My usual go-to when something weird is going on is to pee on a dollar store pregnancy test. And I had exactly one at home. So that was the game plan... rule out pregnancy first then run to the drugstore for some cold meds, get hopped up on them, and conk.

I got home from the trip, got the kids settled, and unceremoniously slipped out to go test my pee for baby.

Not only was it positive, the pink line showed up immediately. Sinking feeling. I had never felt this way about a pregnancy before. Immediate mommy guilt fought the hot tears rolling down my face. I called my husband into our room for insta-support. I could tell he was disappointed at the emotions exploding from my face- he is always my rock and constant stream of positive. I felt so negative about this discovery. I knew that this baby would be a multiplication of love in our family, but I also had so many questions.

How is this going to work?
Where is this baby going to even sleep?
How will we ever pay off debt after adding another mouth to feed?
How will I ever lose the weight?
What about MY plans, MY dreams, MY goals?

Thank GOD for 9 months of gestation. I had all that time to soul search, re-evaluate, and reimagine my dreams. The pregnancy was really hard on my heart, and I unfortunately spent some time in ICU after a scary episode. Thats for another blog, when I share how Jude earned his name.

But looking back, I am so happy it happened this way. Jude James is pure joy for our family. How did we ever live without his tiny kitten noises, and his angel-kissed face. How did I ever live without knowing what it was like to nurse a newborn around the clock (I didn't have such a great experience with nursing my first two). How did I ever doubt my God, who slid this baby into our lives, an unforseen but precious Christmas gift?

You, little man, are life altering for all of us. Your brothers adore you. You are the pride of your daddy. And you are your momma's dream realized.

'Surviving' Mode vs. 'Thriving' Mode

I'm starting this blog series on surviving vs. thriving to record the journey we are currently going through. We've been in 'surviving' mode since June 2012, when my older son was born. The list of things that kept us in survival mode is pretty bananas...

*pre-eclampsia emergency hospital stay June 2012 (lasted 5 days)
*son was born June 2012, 4 weeks early
*gallbladder started acting up, was removed through emergency surgery and a 3 day hospital stay Sept 2012
*mom was diagnosed with leukemia October 2012
*moved 2 hours away with 4 month old, to care for mom's affairs and help with my younger siblings October 2012 - April 2012
*found out I was pregnant with baby2 Jan 2013
*put on bedrest Summer 2013
*developed pre-eclampsia August 2013
*son #2 born August 2013

Since baby #2's birth we have been in survival mode- transitioning to life with 2 closely spaced babies wasn't very easy. All that stuff sounds so terrible when I typed it out but watching my mom's battle through leukemia, while sobering, there was so much victory and joy in being able to cherish and serve her during that time. These challenging months we've been through have been a blessing long term and both my husband and I have had major growth spurts spiritually and emotionally during these times.

Here we are, 7 months later and finally getting to the point where we can start moving from just surviving and keeping our heads above the waves to really thriving personally and as a family.

Part 1 of this transition was getting our sons on a good schedule, which we have done finally!
Part 2 of this transition is getting our home under control.

This week we are taking the boys to a family member's home for a few days and purging and deep cleaning and organizing our disaster zone. I'm excited, nervous for the amount of work... and looking forward to getting a little more sleep than I usually do. Woot!

I'm excited to write more for this series. I didn't start this blog as a parenting blog because that's already 70% of my life and efforts, and while I'm passionate about raising my boys to be amazing and God-fearing adults, I really don't want to lose my true passion in that- fostering personal growth, health (spiritual and physical), and the growth of marriages- ours and others. A little bit of parenting stuff might bleed through into this and I'm gonna let that be okay.

Next up in this series is survival through 'surviving' mode

{AdvoCare} 10 Day Cleanse

11 days ago I did my first real postpartum, non-bfing AdvoCare Cleanse. As you know, I'm a distributor, so I do love the products, and I do share them with others as a business. But for my personal journey, the last 2.5 years I've been limited in the products I was able to use. So when I decided to be done pumping for Noah, I knew it was time to get serious about my health and reintroduce the products I'd been unable to use.

The Cleanse Overview

Spark: I don't know how I would have made it through my pregnancies without spark. I drink 1/2 a day while pregnant and 1 a day while breastfeeding. During the cleanse all you can drink is spark and water. 2 a day max and A gallon of water daily or more (shoot for half your body weight in h2o)

Omegaplex: This is an omega3 supplement and the best one I've found. I usually take 2-3 a day instead of the suggested 1 because everyone needs extra omegas. Great for skin, nails, hair, heart, brain, GI tract. I don't burp fishy after I take them, unlike other brands I tried.

 Herbal Cleanse: In the herbal cleanse box there are 3 products. Fiber drink (PLUG AND CHUG BABY), herbal cleanse tablets (full of all sorts of natural herbs and goodies to reduce toxins) and probiotic restore (replaces the bad gut flora with good gut flora).  

What I Ate

I usually try to make an interesting menu for myself because I'm a bit of a foodie and cooking is my hobby. But this time my mantra was "back to basics" so thats what I did. Super balanced meals, and I ate a lot of the same things. It wasn't bad at all and it really took the focus off my food. I pre-prepped everything.

Breakfasts were meal replacement shakes or boiled eggs and greens with a wee bit of hot sauce
Lunches were salads with boiled eggs, tuna or chicken, cherry tomatoes, cucumbers, and a dash of hot sauce or lime juice and chili powder
Dinners were grilled chicken, sweet potatoes, and brussel sprouts or tilapia and asparagus.
Snacks were almonds and banana, almond butter and apple, or sweet potatoes w/ boiled egg and hot sauce

Results & Final Thoughts

My results were incredible. I lost 9.1lbs, which is great and all but it was pretty much the weight I had put back on while I was weaning from breastfeeding (which was stressful), the most important part for me is that I feel really good. My pants fit really loose and I can tell my vitamin absorption is higher than it was because when I eat, I feel energy and not the constant need to nap. As a mom of 2 under 2, that's more important than the weight dropped.

I really felt good this time while cleansing. It was my first real cleanse after babies and nursing and all that, and I felt like I was removing the food distraction by doing the meal prep. The 6 fiber drinks weren't my favorite moment during the day (first 3 days and last 3 days), but I plugged and chugged and they did their job! I did very good with the meal prepping and my family didn't suffer from having to eat lean meat and veggies for every meal because I made them their own dinner and it wasn't hard knowing I had a dinner ready for myself already.

Whats Next?

Consistency, thats whats next. Getting back to training for my 10k and half marathon early next year. Going on AdvoCare's MNS max C nutrition plus thermoplus. And thinking about trying 1 slim a day too. I am going to continue meal prepping for myself, with less basic meals this time.

Feeling blessed to have these products on my side and because I have momentum now I'm going to keep pushing this massive boulder up the hill, knowing its going to continue getting smaller and smaller and smaller. Its easy to get caught up in the mindset that its only the products working... I want you to know this plan requires consistency and hard work to achieve the results you desire. Diet mentality doesn't work here. But focus and determination mixed with consistency will always help you achieve your next milestone.

And praise the Lord for that!

Curious about trying the 24 Day Challenge with free coaching from me? Email me... chasingahundred [at] gmail DOT com

{Life Update} The one with the new season.

Its been awhile. I have a bazillion excuses why I haven't blogged... one because the destruction of my laptop. It was getting really slow and was really really old so we pulled out my desktop from college (it was majorly virus infected), pulled all the important stuff off it and reformatted it and it works now! So I have blogging capabilities. Anyway... onto the life update. God always makes it really apparent to me when we are transitioning into a new season. My desire for some massive changes in our home has really clued me in. We have the opportunity to send our boys to their grandparents house for three days so that we can do a deep purge of our home and minimize majorly. We have also started Dave Ramsey's baby steps. We had step 1 complete and then washer went out this morning, so we have to go back and re-add to the emergency fund depending on how much it costs to fix the silly thing. I am grateful the money is there! I stopped pumping exclusively. This is still a bit tender for me, but I don't regret the decision to discontinue. I'm so blessed I had the ability to provide both my boys breastmilk almost exclusively (ben had formula for 3 days as a newborn)for 6 months. Meaning I pumped 14 months for both boys and I'm proud of myself for getting there. Noah adjusted to formula and solids beautifully, just as Ben did and I'm grateful for the convenience and my newfound freedom from hanging with the pump 6-8 times a day. All parenting aside, my weight loss has been slow. I'm still hanging between the 35-40 mark. Weaning from the pump was stressful and during that 2 weeks I gained some, which is to be expected. I've cut back on working out for now until we get our four walls into check this week and then next week I start training again to run longer distances. The plan for now is 2 short (2 miles?) runs a week and one long run (4+) miles. Our busy summer is barreling quickly toward us. I'm trying to prepare! Oh and sleep. Yeah... not getting much of that these days. I mean I do have a 7 month old and a 21 month old but yeah. I'm pretty pooped ;) More on my most recently successful cleanse later. That one gets its own post!

Persist without Exception

Even though people make fun of you... Persist without exception

Even though they don't believe in you... Persist without exception

Even though you're sad and want to emoeat... Persist without exception

Even though you fall down, get up... Persist without exception

Even when you miss you alarm and wake up late, find another time to workout... Persist without exception

Even though making dinner is inconvenient... Persist without exception

Even though soda sounds tastier than water... Persist without exception

Even when everyone else is eating it... Persist without exception

Even though you're afraid of failing... Persist without exception

I've been creating too many exceptions for myself lately... Oh it's dinner out with friends, I can eat a burger and have a coke! Oh it's Sunday night, I can eat an excessive amount of dessert... Oh I just ran 3 miles, I can eat what I want today.

I'm so tired of this mindset. So tired of the excuses, tired of the fat clothes and especially tired of reaching for food to support myself emotionally. I was made for so much more than this. 

Today my new script is "persist without exception". When something happens and I want to deviate from the plan... Persist without exception. I am not the exception, I am the rule. I'm worth sticking through it and reaping the rewards of true health and physical fitness.

What areas of your life need a little script re-writing?

Quick Update 2/2

Happy Super Bowl Sunday! I have some neat things going on in my life I'd love to share.

I ran 3.1 miles in just under 54 minutes the other day. It was my first 5k (on my own). I walked about half a mile total. The third mile felt SO good! I know 54 minutes is really slow but I'd like the haters to remember that I am carrying around 60-80 extra pounds over my healthy weight. I fully expect to be running faster 5ks as the year progresses and my weight drops and my endurance builds.

I signed up for the Disneyland 10k in August! Going with my best friend and I am so excited. Feb 2015 is the Princess Half and I will begin to train for it in the fall.

My first 5k EVER is in 6 days. I'm so stinking excited. I want to run it in 50 minutes or less. With my marathoner bestie by my side I know I can do it!

I can now do 15 push-ups consecutively. I still modify with knees but I'm working on it!

I've been reading the book "Made to Crave" and it's really been eye opening to realizing that this journey is highly spiritual. It's equipping me in new and transforming ways.

In January I lost 8 pounds! I gained some over the holidays, but I now claim victory over that struggle!

Fight on friends!

Jaci

1 Cor 10:23

1 Cor 10:23

Everything is permissible, but not everything is beneficial (paraphrase)

This week I started a bible study through proverbs31 ministries (p31.org). We are studying the book "Made to Crave" by Lysa TerKeurst. In all honesty, this is perfect timing.

You all know this blog is about my weight loss journey. As much as I want to lose the weight to feel good about myself, to be healthy, the glory of fitting into my skinny jeans (and posting it on Instagram)... I'm realizing that this journey has to be so much more than that to continue to be successful.

So in the 4 chapters I've devoured of this book (pun totally intended), I have just been blown away by how much The Lord has shown me about ME this week.

Let's cast some light into the dark corners for a second. I hope this is as healing as they say it is. 

I dislike the conflict and disorder In my life so much that I try to avoid it at all costs. Sometimes this is subconscious for me and sometimes I'm clapping my hands over my ears and screaming "LA LA LA" to ignore the blindingly obvious problem in front of me. This isn't just a one-facet-of-my-life kind of disease... It has worked it's way through *almost* everything I'm facing.

When I avoid, I eat. Like shameful, hiding in the corner, throw away the fast food bag so my husband doesn't see it, pretend-that-didn't-happen kind of eating. It's obvious from the last 8 years that this isn't working for me. I don't even know how much weight I've actually gained since then- because I was avoiding the scale.

Reading this book, all 4 chapters I've read so far, have just completely ripped off my blinders. I've realized that this isn't just a control over food kinda issue... This is a hiding from God, perfectionistic, walls up, stinking thinking kinda problem.

So there's the problem. It's funny to me how simple simple simple the solution is: ask for help. My job is to ask the Helper, the Healer, my Hope, my Father to replace my fearshamedoubt cravings with cravings of Him.

Cravings have become a prayer trigger for me... A trigger that I need to ask for guidance. In "Made to Crave", Lysa shares on page 29 "God never intended for us to want anything more than we want Him." I mean, wow. How simple and profound is that?

I've been repeating 1 Cor 10:23 to myself. Of course it's permissible to eat whatever I want. When I'm in the kitchen making myself a meal, I'm asking myself: is this beneficial? Is this food going to fuel me to complete my purpose- my God given assignments here on earth? Chances are when I frame my decisions with fueling the Father's will and my work for the Kingdom... I'm going to eat something green instead of something white and refined. Because when I'm really honest with myself, that's what He created for me to eat. God didn't send down Doritos from heaven. He didn't plant Oreo trees either.

I need lots of prayer in this journey. I'd love to pray for some of my brothers and sisters going through this journey too... Share in the comments how I can pray for you and know that you'll have me warring for you as much as I'm warring for myself.

Blessings.

Jaci