Today I Made the Bed.

Today I made the bed. This may seem like a small feat to many. Actually, it's quite embarrassing. Ever since I was a kid, I've struggled to care about my mess. Which led me to struggle with caring about myself. Deep down somewhere in my past, I stopped caring about what I looked like, and what and who I surrounded myself with.

Somehow this led to a gigantic weight gain over the last 8-10 years. I just stopped caring about myself.

I can't exactly pinpoint why. I have a loving, handsome, champion of a husband. And two sons. B is 14 months and N is 2 weeks old. I care for them. I was (and still am) careful to breastfeed both, even though its been a struggle for me in both cases. I feed my husband and toddler hearty and healthy meals. I snuggle and play and dream with my sons & my man. I take them to the doctor when they're sick, pray over them daily and take them to church (I could do it more), and worry about their safety and their futures (which I could do less of).

But somewhere there was a disconnect about caring for myself. And our home.

Last night I prayed for the strength to change. And today I got up, and made the bed.

This is my journey, chasing my dreams of losing 100 pounds and becoming more.